Pee opportunities and two things that made me grin today

When I'm driving a taxi, I sometimes have to pee. It's safe to say that in a given shift, I have to pee about three times. Sometimes I combine the peeing with getting something to eat or drink. It works well. I buy a Chai at Starbucks, I use their bathroom. I buy a Mocha at Philz, I use his bathroom. I buy a bagel at Terra Cotta, I use the bathroom there. But sometimes I'm not hungry or thirsty, and I still have to pee. In that case, I have to figure something out. Sometimes, if I'm in the neighborhood, I use the bathroom at my own house. But there are also a number of places littered all over the city where I know I can just sneak in and use the bathroom, and nothing bad will happen. I know that because I have done it many times. Here are some of those places:

- 600 Townsend (at 7th Street). I used to work in that building. I know where the bathrooms are. I walk straight in and go to the bathroom, and people think I know what I'm doing. That's because I do know what I'm doing. And I usually say hi to Michael who runs the coffee stand in the building.
- CCAC, the art school at 8th Street and 16th Street. I used to get coffee there when I worked in that building at 7th and Townsend.
- An office building on Union and Battery. I do freelance work there on the days I don't drive a taxi. If somebody I know sees me, they think I'm working there that day. But I'm just there to pee.
- The Levi's building at Battery and Filbert. It's really close to the office building on Union and Battery, so I know how it works in there.
- The Marriott on Columbus and Bay. One really early morning I just walked in there, right past the valets, and used their bathroom, and I have been coming back ever since.
- The Wells Fargo/Starbucks combination on Geary and 20th Avenue. The Starbucks employees think I'm there to see a teller. The bank employees think I'm there to get some Starbucks. So everybody leaves me alone.
- The Wells Fargo/Starbucks combination on Van Ness and California. Same deal.

I'm probably forgetting some places, like the Argent Hotel where I have peed once or twice, but that's okay.

Anyway. Today I decided to stop by the art school to pee and to get something to eat. While I was walking towards the art school, a boy and a girl walked by me. I smiled at the boy, and he smiled at me. After I was done peeing and eating at the art school, I drove 16th Street all the way down to Valencia, then drove Valencia all the way down to 26th Street, then took 26th Street to Mission, and as I was driving on Mission near 24th Street, there was a call on the radio for an order at De Haro and 24th. I decided to check in for the order and was assigned to it. I picked up an Australian woman and her probably-about-two-year-old daughter. They were going to Montgomery and Jackson. I took De Haro back towards 16th Street. And at the corner of 16th and De Haro, there were the boy and the girl I had seen earlier near the art school! They were standing on the corner waiting to cross the street. I stopped to let them go. They both looked at me, and I smiled at them. The boy recognized me from earlier. He smiled back and waved. And then he grinned. And then I grinned too. I grinned for a whole block.

So then I was driving that woman and her little daughter. The woman asked me how long I had been driving a cab (six months). She asked me if I liked it (YES). She asked me if I made enough money doing it (NO). I told her that because it doesn't pay that well, I am only doing it two days a week. She asked me what else I did besides driving a cab. I told her that I was a psychic counselor. She asked me a lot of questions about that. She took my business card. Then she asked me more questions, and I answered them.

"Can I have another business card?"

"Sure."

"She just ate the one you gave me."

"Oh."

I turned around. The little girl looked at me and my business card was folded in half and sticking out of her mouth. It made me grin, in a good way. Again, I grinned for a whole block.

"This reminds me of when I used to eat paper as a kid," the woman continued.

"You ate paper too?"

"Yeah, I did it well into my teens."

"Did you swallow it too?"

"Yep."