Day Cabbie

San Francisco taxi stories from one of the very rare female drivers

Another driver's stories

Last night I had coffee with my favorite cab driver. He has been a San Francisco driver for twelve years.

"So what's your favorite taxi story?" I asked him.

He told me about a couple in their 60's who were making out in the back of the car. It involved an exposed nipple. He took them from a fancy restaurant in San Francisco all the way to Lafayette. The nipple made its appearance on the Bay Bridge.

"So that's your favorite, huh?" I asked. He nodded.

Then he told me another one. The night driver of his taxi had taken a woman to the Hyatt Regency the night before. She had asked the night driver if he could take her to the airport at 5 in the morning. The night driver had told her that he would be off by then but that he would send the day driver. The night driver then wrote down her name, her phone number, and that she wanted to be picked up from the Hyatt Regency and taken to the airport at 5am. The night driver put the piece of paper behind the car visor. When my friend started his shift at 4am the next morning, he didn't see the note behind the visor. He started out in the Sunset that morning, and his first fare brought him from the Sunset over to 101 California, a mere two blocks from the Hyatt Regency. My friend said he never waits in hotel lines but this time there was not a single cab in line at the Hyatt Regency. He thought to himself "Hm, I'm first in line" and pulled up. A woman was standing at the hotel entrance with luggage. She said "You were supposed to pick me up. You are late." He ignored her scolding, told her to get in and took her to the airport. Later that day, when he was getting gas, he found the note behind the visor. It dawned on him that he had picked up the woman he was supposed to pick up without knowing it.

Somehow I liked this story much better than the first one.

"You're psychic," I beamed at him.

"There was something," he said.

Gifts

In May I took a woman to a little alley in Noe Valley. She told me that I looked like an elf. She also told me about this book that talks about different types of magical creatures and how you can find out which one you are. Starpeople, she said, might have a spiritual beam going up from their shoulder that connects them to a starship. I made it apparent that this book sounded very interesting to me. When we got to her house, she asked me to wait for a few minutes. When she returned, she handed me a little tiny book by Doreen Virtue called Earth Angels: A Pocket Guide for Incarnated Angels, Elementals, Starpeople, Walk-Ins, and Wizards. She said she didn't need it anymore, but that I did.

The day after the 4th of July I picked up a guy in the Richmond and took him to the Haight. He told me he worked at a restaurant called Pres a Vi in the Presidio. I had never heard of it, and he said that I should come see him sometime. If he had said to stop by, I probably wouldn't have but since he said to come see him, I actually considered it. It made it more personal or something.

That Saturday I took myself and a friend to Pres a Vi. First we sat at the bar and sipped expensive cocktails while we watched my new friend make such cocktails. We each had two, and then we moved over to a table to eat dinner. When we were done eating, we received our check but it didn't have the drinks on it, only the food. I called our waiter and told him that the drinks were missing from our bill. He said "Louie took care of it." My new friend had just hooked us up with $40 worth of cocktails. We tipped him $20 and were very pleased.

A few weeks ago a guy who works for Apple was in my cab. I asked him if it was true that Apple had given every single one of their employees an iPhone. He confirmed the rumor. I told him that I had recently played with an iPhone and that I was considering buying one. He asked me what I didn't like about the iPhone. I told him that sometimes the phone got stuck in locked mode. I also told him that I heard that the headphone jack doesn't fit standard headphones, and that that was no good. I also told him that sometimes the phone didn't respond fast enough to changes in screen orientation. He told me to give him my email address and that he would give me 15 to 20% off when I was ready to buy my iPhone.

Gifts happen.

Blue? How about green?

"Is Green Cab a new company?" the lady that had called from Fulton and Divisadero asked.

"Yes." She was distracted by the dog she was leaving behind; that's why I kept my answer short.

"How cool," she said when her attention had returned.

"How did you find out about us?"

"Well, I wasn't going to call Yellow."

"Uh-huh."

"I mean, they are big but they are rude."

"Uh-huh."

"To be honest, I was going to call the one with the blue and white cars."

"DeSoto!"

"Yes. But I didn't remember their name. So I called 411. And I said to the operator 'I was going to ask for the blue cab company, but just get me any cab company.' And the operator said 'Any cab company?' And I said 'Yes', and he said 'Well, blue.. How about green?' And I said 'Sure', so he called the green cab company for me."

"Wow," I suddenly had a huge smile on my face, "that is so cool!"

That 411 operator sounds like a cool, green person. We need more people like him around.

The cookbook author from Salt Lake City

I had this lady in my cab today. She has written three cookbooks and was on her way to a meeting with Chronicle Books to talk about her next book. I envy her. I want to talk to Chronicle Books about my next book.